Agnus Dei Farm Blog
My Ten Proverbs To A Life Long Marriage
September 29, 2019 – 47 Years
Deborah W. Giles
I. Marry Your Best Friend. If you do not enjoy the company of your mate and need time away (girls’ night out and separate vacations), you might want to keep looking.
II. Marry Young. We married right out of high school and in today’s world this is frowned upon. I do not have a slough of ex-boyfriends that I regret. We almost read each other’s mind because our life experience is shared. We literally grew into adults together.
III. Burn Your Bridges. The marriage vows say, “till death do us part.” In this culture, many view marriages like going steady, instead viewing your vows as a life commitment until death, then to leave your marriage will mean a new life alone. This commitment makes you fight for your marriage no matter what the cost. At the end of life your houses, cars and land will not be important, but those people who are in the mystical union of family will be your treasure.
IV. No Secrets or Private Worlds. If you have personal email accounts, phones, social media accounts that you do not share with your mate, then you have a secret world where temptations can be born. I have been told that ½ of today’s divorces are born on social media. Keep your world open to your mate.
V. Respect Your Husband and He Will Love You. Ephesians 5:33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. If you do not respect a man, please do not marry him. If you will notice the Bible does not say anything about the woman’s love, maybe because the way a woman shows love to a man is thru respect.
VI. Never Let the Sun Go Down On Your Anger. If you ever get into a habit of unforgiveness, it will fester and lead to bitterness and strife. Humility is a treasure of marriage where we lose our pride and settle matters quickly. Pride goes before destruction and pride will destroy a marriage. Remember Jesus died for something he did not do and sometimes in marriage we must find resolutions that end conflicts. Never let a wound fester, be the first to apologize even if you are not wrong, humility always wins. Sometimes I do not practice this well, but it is always a sign of pride.
VII. Always Try to Outdo Each Other In Thoughtfulness. Try not to be too tired to serve your mate. Life is hectic, but do not let all your energies be spent outside your family. This is not selfish because the building block of society is the family, so a strong family is a strong society. If you are thinking good things about your spouse express them, most people are too thrifty with their compliments. Every plant needs water, sun, pruning and fertilizer. Compliments are all those things, be generous in expressing your love through praise.
VIII. Do Not Marry Outside Your Faith. When you are first “in love,” overlooking important things like going to church together, with the hope it will work out over time, often do not. The strongest families are the ones where God is at the center of the marriage and family. There is nothing lonelier than practicing your faith without your spouse. How could one chase a thousand, and two put ten thousand to flight? The power of unity in Faith multiplies your power to face life. You will face trials and the storms in life and only God can see you through.
IX. Be the Other Half. Matthew, Mark and Ephesians all tell us that the mystical union of marriage makes two people become one. If you think glue is strong, imagine a union created by God that fuses two people into one person. Before marriage, you are a whole person (single ladies you are NOT half a person), but after marriage you are half of another person. If you view marriage this way, then the thought of being separated from your spouse is unthinkable. You will fight for that union as you would fight for your own life because it is your life!
X. Make Family Building Your Goal in Life. The goal of life is not possessions and fame, but FAMILY. Material riches in this life will be left behind on your deathbed and only loved ones can join you in the mystery of eternal life. So, make your life about the people God has given you, your family.
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